


The Whole Academy’s on Fire!

by FierySprites



Series: The Many Ways V3 Could’ve Gone Wrong [8]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Sonic the Hedgehog (Video Games), Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Adventure, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Crossover, Dub Terms, Gen, Humor, Mild Angst, Mild Language, New Dangan Ronpa V3 Spoilers, POV First Person, POV Multiple, Sonic 2006, Spoilers, that tornado’s carrying a monokuma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:08:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28031400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FierySprites/pseuds/FierySprites
Summary: Beyond the Death Road of Despair lies the apocalypse.Except it’s the wrong apocalypse.And the wrong world, for that matter.(Welcome to Crisis City, Kaede and co.)(A crack crossover betweenSonic 2006andDanganronpa V3: Killing Harmony. Takes place midway into DRV3’s first chapter. No glitches included, unfortunately.)
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede/Saihara Shuichi, Knuckles the Echidna & Miles "Tails" Prower & Sonic the Hedgehog
Series: The Many Ways V3 Could’ve Gone Wrong [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1152227
Comments: 8
Kudos: 32
Collections: Quality Fics





	1. Out of the Frying Pan…

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which two groups of heroes stumble onto a future that shouldn’t be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the _Danganronpa_ universe, this fic is set midway through Chapter 1 of _Danganronpa V3: Killing Harmony._
> 
> For the _Sonic_ universe, this fic is set during the events of _Sonic the Hedgehog (2006),_ while Team Sonic and Team Dark are in Crisis City.
> 
> No major spoilers are featured for _Sonic ’06_ (not like there’s anything _to_ spoil there, anyway), but there are several endgame spoilers for _Danganronpa V3_ included. Reader discretion is advised.
> 
> Some bits of dialogue are inspired by Child at Heart Forever’s amazing _’06_ trilogy, with _[We Both Remember](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10628258/7/We-Both-Remember)_ serving as the primary inspiration.

**[Sonic]**

**Ruined Future  
Crisis City – Overlooking Cliff**

I felt my hands clench into fists as I stared at the hellscape before me.

A permanently orange sky, covered in dusty clouds and ash—

A endless array of ruined buildings, crumbling away with broken windows—

A winding series of broken roads, a desolate lack of any actual survivors—

This was a nightmare to behold, a world so much worse than anything Eggman can cook up by himself.

Even on the Little Planet, those zones trapped in a Bad Future were at least still _active;_ they at least still marched on with the fires of industrialization, as much as I hated how they ruined the natural beauty of the world around it.

But this…? This couldn’t be described as anything other than an **apocalypse** , plain and simple.

And worse yet…

 _… **this** _was our future.

A future that had existed for two hundred years.

A future that I had been helpless to stop.

And if Silver’s words were right…

_“I’ve been looking for you. You’re the **Iblis Trigger**._

_“Your actions will **condemn us all!”**_

…this was all _my_ fault.

Despite everything I’ve done, despite everything I’ve fought to save…

In the end, this was all that my efforts would lead to.

_“How could someone like you cause the destruction of our world?”_

_…I don’t know, Silver,_ I thought to myself. _I don’t know._

_But what I **do** know is…_

_…I’m not gonna let things end this way._

_Not by a long shot._

“Eggman’s got some nerve, dropping us here,” I growled.

“Tell me about it,” Knuckles said. “How are we supposed to get back to our time!?”

Shadow crossed his arms and looked toward me, Tails, and Knuckles. “We’ll need to induce a space-time rift, but that’ll require a lot of energy.”

I knew exactly what he was talking about, given his area of expertise.

“I see,” I trailed off—“so, using your Chaos Control will…!”

“Yes,” Shadow cut me off, directing a finger at my chest, “but that alone is insufficient.”

I raised an eyebrow.

“Alone, my Chaos Control won’t get us very far,” he elaborated. “But if we can get two Chaos Emeralds, and you and I use Chaos Control _together,_ that might be enough to open up a time rift and send us back to our own present.”

I grinned—now this was more my speed. “Two Chaos Emeralds, huh…? Sounds like a plan!”

“We’re counting on you, Sonic, Shadow,” Tails cheered. “With you two around, I know we’ll be able to get out of this!”

“Just don’t go warping us into the Prehistoric Age, or the Middle Ages, Chaos forbid the Three-Day War,” Knuckles groused. “This adventure’s already been way too much trouble.”

“Oh, come on, Knux,” Rouge smiled, draping an arm over Knuckles, “you can’t tell me you’re _not_ excited over this little race. I bet I can find that Chaos Emerald before you do, honey.”

 _“What!?”_ He shook off her arm and brought his fists together. “Oh, _no you won’t!”_

I hopped up and down, ready to dispense with the talking and get to the running. “Alright, then! ‘Nuff messing around— _let’s get to work!”_

_“Wh-Wh- **WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!?”**_

All of us paused in our tracks.

“…that wasn’t any of you four, right?” I had to ask.

Tails shook his head. “I think it came from over there!” he said, pointing toward a large-domed building in the distance—which, if I squinted, looked suspiciously less derelict than everything else around here.

“Hmph.” Shadow took a step forward. “Looks like we’ve got company. Shall we start there instead?”

I reached down and put my hands in front of my feet. “I like the way you think, Shads. Whenever you’re ready!”

* * *

**[Kaede]**

**Death Road of Despair – Exit**

I—

I don’t know what to say.

I gaped at the hellscape beyond our academy, at the fires sprouting from every surface, at the long neglect every building wore, at the ash that permeated the air—

“What—What is—” I choked out.

 _“Wh-Wh- **WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!?”**_ Miu screamed at the top of her lungs.

“…yeah, that,” Shuichi breathed.

We’d been going at the Death Road of Despair for god knows how long.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been blown up by a dropping bomb, or fallen through a collapsing floor, or been carried away by a falling jail cell.

(My legs feel so numb right now.)

But that’s not important.

What’s important is that we made it out—out of the Ultimate Academy, and out of Monokuma’s so-called ‘Killing Game’.

And what we found beyond the academy walls…

…

…was horrifying beyond belief.

“Wow,” Kokichi said, his voice at once filled with awe and shock, “the _whole city’s_ on fire! That’s… really terrible!”

“This can’t be real…” Keebo said, more conventionally alarmed. “This is—This is the outside world!?”

“Yep! That’s _riiiiiiiiiiiight~!”_ Monokuma sang. “Man, you guys are _really_ lucky you found this out before anyone actually died. But if it means I get to see y’all’s despair levels skyrocket into infinity, then I guess I can excuse this displaced plot twist!”

He tilted his head, a bit of confusion present on his robotic face. “I could’ve sworn the air here was less breathable, though… I wonder what that’s about…”

“Don’t mess with our heads like that!” Kaito yelled. “Stop spitting out nonsense and tell us what’s going on!”

 _“Huh?_ Do I _have_ to?” our ~~(former?)~~ captor asked, a paw raised to his mouth. “The truth is right here in front of your eyes! Civilization as you know it has ended; despair has won and there’s nothing you can do about it! But if you still want to live out here after everything, then be my guest! Puhuhuhuhuhuhu!”

This got reactions out of everyone.

“No way! No way, no way, _no way!”_

“You lie! Atua wouldn’t allow this!”

“Tch… So there’s really nothing left for us…?”

“Gonta confused! Why is world on fire!?”

“I can’t believe this…” Tsumugi whimpered—“the world… is it actually…!?”

I wanted to reassure everyone, to tell them not to give up, to keep lifting their spirits up with hope—

—but my mouth just couldn’t find the words to say.

I felt somebody clasp my hand.

A bit surprised, I turned my head—and there was Shuichi, trying to reassure me as best he could. He didn’t have any idea what to do, either, but—we were still here and alive, so…

…that has to count for something, right?

I took in a deep breath and gave him a nod, as thanks.

_I gotta stay strong. I can’t lose hope here!_

_‘Cause if I do—then **everyone** will._

“It doesn’t matter what you tell us,” I said to Monokuma. “We made it out of your stupid Killing Game! What—Whatever happened to the world, we’ll figure it out, too!”

_~~It’s better than being forced to **kill** each other, at least!~~ _

“If you say so,” he said, still infuriatingly chipper as always. “But if you do, just know: there won’t be any of your fancy-schmancy luxuries out there! Food, water, anime, condoms… if you want all of that, you’ll have to stay inside here—and I’ll expect a murder if you do!”

I grit my teeth, the tension in the air palpably increasing with every word he spoke.

“So, what will it be!? Freedom in this wasteland of a world, or safety in the comfort of the Killing Game—!?”

Suddenly, a strong wind blew through the ruined zone, catching all of us—Monokuma included—off-guard.

“Man, now _this_ is one heck of a party! I didn’t think we’d have _this_ many people hanging around!”

* * *

**[Sonic]**

It didn’t take me long to get to the dome of interest.

I mean, it was basically right outside our doorstep, and I _am_ the Fastest Thing Alive.

That being said, I didn’t expect to see a bunch of _kids_ here, looking like they just came from our time.

Or… maybe not; while Mobius is a pretty diverse place, I think even these guys would be a bit much. I can already tell, they’re a colorful cast of characters.

…not like me and my friends have room to talk.

Anyway…

I took stock of all the shocked faces in front of me – sixteen, to be exact, plus this strange monochromatic bear with a menacing red eye.

“What’s all the silence for?” I asked, wagging a finger in the air. “You all look like you’ve never seen a hedgehog before!”

…

…

…

A beat passed, and came the explosion.

_“HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”_

**_“Ehhhh!?_ ** _Am I high, or is this actually fucking happening!?”_

_“Nyeh… I don’t remember summoning any familiars…”_

_“Oh my… do I see a new creature to study, right before my eyes?”_

_“What is this. What is **any** of this.”_

_“…well, I can certainly say I haven’t seen this before yet.”_

The clear leader of the group—this blonde girl with a pink vest and musical-themed apparel—replied loudly and succinctly: “Of—Of course we haven’t! I don’t remember hearing about any hedgehogs on the news!”

I snorted. _Gee, tough crowd._

They’re definitely not from this time—or my world at all, for that matter. They look like they’ve never seen a Mobian before, and us Mobians should still be around no matter what the timeframe.

Something funky’s going on, and it’s not just ‘cause of Eggman’s doing.

“I know you,” a voice whispered.

I blinked, taking notice of the kid who spoke – a long, blue-haired girl with dorky glasses and a fearfully confused expression.

“You’re supposed to just be a video game character,” she said. “You’re not supposed to be real; just _fiction._ None of this is supposed to happen in the first place. So how is it at all that you’re standing here, in front of us…?”

_…huh. So they’re from one of **those** types of universes._

When you’ve been adventuring as long as I have, you tend to see a lot of things, especially when it comes to other worlds. And you’d be surprised at how much the ‘I’m one of gaming’s biggest franchises’ tends to crop up.

_Good to know, I guess._

Behind me, I heard a trail of footsteps and spinning tails getting louder and louder. I cast a glance behind me and smirked – there was Tails and Knuckles, finally catching up to me.

“‘Bout time you guys made it!” I said to them as they stood beside me – Team Sonic, made complete again. “You’re just in time, too; we’ve got a brand new audience to entertain!”

“Whoa,” Tails breathed, “look at all those guys! I’ve never seen anyone like ‘em! Where’d they all come from?”

Knuckles squinted. “They don’t look like small fry, either. Pinwheel Lady and Macho Glasses especially seem like sturdy fighters—by human standards, at least.”

“Hmph.” Shadow and Rouge joined us soon after, the former looking as disinterested as ever, the latter showing curiosity in our latest finds.

“Whatever the case may be,” the black hedgehog continued, “it’s a good thing we managed to stumble upon them before anything else did. This future is not exactly one I can see being kind to its inhabitants.”

“Tell me about it,” Rouge remarked. “This climate isn’t exactly doing wonders for my makeup.”

“Th-Them, too…!?” the bluenette mouthed.

The gathered teenagers started to murmur and shout again, reacting in all kinds of ways to my friends’ added presence. The one who _wasn’t_ a human teenager – the robot bear (because come on, he couldn’t be anything _but_ a robot) – stomped on forward, his face red with fury.

 ** _“That’s enough!”_** he screamed, sharp claws sprouting from his paws. “I didn’t ask for _you_ furry freaks to intrude on my Killing Game! Haven’t you infected enough franchises, you pesky blue hedgehog!?”

Tails and Knuckles shared a look, and turned to me. “…Sonic, do you know him?”

I shook my head. “Not in the slightest.”

I’ve fought a lot of things, deities and demons alike – but I think I’d remember if a reject Pokémon happened to be on that list.

“You may not know me,” he growled, “but _I_ sure as hell know **_you!_** And I’m not about to let some speedy little abortion get in the way of _my_ Killing Game!”

Shadow scoffed. “We don’t have time to deal with you,” he bluntly stated—“and based on what you just said, you clearly don’t have anything good planned for these children. I’ll say this once: leave us alone, or you won’t like the consequences.”

“Yeah, buddy,” I chimed in, “you don’t wanna cross Shadow on a bad day.”

“As if I’d listen to you!” he spat. “You think you’re so cool and blue, but I’m the _god_ of this little world! I hold the power of life and death over each and every one of you—and now, I’m going to prove it!”

He held his paws high and began to charge toward us.

_“URAAAAAAAAAAAH! HERE COMES **MONOKUMAAAAAA—!”**_

And then this fiery phoenix thing swooped on down and snatched him off the ground, flying off into the ashen skies above.

_**“WAAAAAAAA** AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaa…!”_

I watched dispassionately as he became evermore a tiny dot in the distance.

“…huh,” I let out. “That was underwhelming.”

 _That_ was promptly followed up by a bunch of similar-looking monsters – birds and worms and whatever else – bursting outta nowhere and surrounding all of us.

 _I gotta ask Tails if there’s a word for 'stranger than strange’,_ I thought.

_‘Cause right now, I’m feeling like today’s it._

* * *

**[Kaede]**

I yelped as at the sight of these strange, horrific monsters bearing down on us.

 _The Exisals have nothing on this…!_ I gulped, taking a step back and holding onto Shuichi’s hand tighter. _One touch from them, and I think we’d be history!_

“Wh-What the heck are those!?” Tenko screeched, bringing her arms up defensively. “Himiko, get behind me!”

The self-proclaimed Mage did so with only a panicked _“Nyeh!”. ~~(No time to complain when your life’s in danger, I guess!)~~_

“Don’t worry, everybody!” Gonta said—“Gonta will protect you!”

“This looks like it’s gonna be a big fight,” Kaito remarked. Then he grinned, pumping a fist into his palm. “Nothing the Luminary of the Stars can’t handle!”

Sweat dripped down my head. “What do we do?” I quietly asked, well out of my depth. “What do we do, what do we do, _what do we do!?”_

“I don’t know,” Shuichi frowned—“but we can’t stay here! And if we go back into the Academy now, there’s no telling what’ll happen to us!”

We’re not safe out here, and we’re definitely not safe inside with Monokuma!

No matter what we do, we’re not in any better circumstance than before!

Is there any way we can get out of this…?

…

My gaze turned toward our unexpected visitors.

“No way they’re getting through!” the blue hedgehog— _Sonic?_ —exclaimed. “Tails, Knuckles, ready to party?”

“Uh-huh! Just leave it to me!”

“Ha! Do you really have to ask?”

“So, I guess it’s up to us to play the hero, then,” the bat said. “Fine by me. A girl’s gotta get her exercise somehow. Hope you can keep up, Shadow.”

‘Shadow’ smirked. “I should be the one telling _you_ that, Rouge.”

The two hedgehogs curled up into a ball, orbs of light orbiting around their bodies. After a few seconds of this, they stopped and uncurled—

_“Ready?”_

—and then the five of them took off at once.

**_“Go!”_ **

I couldn’t exactly tell what they were all doing, but all the fire monsters were falling over in no time flat. Blue and black blurs were bouncing off of them; the fox was flinging these… strange boxes everywhere; the… red guy and the bat were just cutting loose—

“Whoa,” Shuichi gasped. “They’re fast! R-Really, _really_ fast!”

“I can barely even see them, too!” I said. “How can they even move like that…!?”

_Man, am I feeling a lot like Chopin’s Minute Waltz right now…!_

“This is real,” Tsumugi breathed. “Omigod, this is real. _Omigod, this is **real—”**_

It was over in a flash. The monsters had all been vanquished, and the Sonic Squad were back on the ground, no worse for wear. “Okay,” Sonic said, “looks like it’s time to bail! Shadow, Rouge, we’ll meet back with you at the edge of the city. Don’t be late!”

“Heh. Same to you.” The odd duo sprinted in the opposite direction, off to do… whatever it is they had to do.

Before I could even raise a question, Sonic was up in my face and flashing an easy-going smile. “Yo! I’m Sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog! Gotta say, I didn’t expect to see kids like you in this place. Who are you two lovey-dovey types?”

My cheeks flushed red, Shuichi and I both spluttering at his sudden insinuation.

I shook my head. _Get it together, Kaede!_

“I’m—I’m Kaede Akamatsu, and this is Shuichi Saihara,” I introduced us. “I’m the Ultimate Pianist, and he’s the Ultimate Detective.”

Sonic whistled. “Ultimate Pianist and Ultimate Detective, huh…? Bet there’s a cool story behind those titles.” He bounced on his feet. “I’m not sure what’s up with you guys, but you’re not really from this time, are you?”

Shuichi nodded. “I—I think so. At the very least, it wasn’t raining apocalypses _before_ we were kidnapped by Monokuma.”

“Tell us you can get us outta here,” I pleaded—“I wanna go back to sleeping under a clear sky and playing piano without worry! Same thing for all of our friends!” …minus the piano part, anyway.

“Well…” Sonic tapped his foot against the ground. “Shadow and I have something up our sleeves, but it’s not exactly safe. That being said, sticking ‘round here doesn’t seem that much more fun, so—c’mon! Why don’t you join us?”

I pursed my lips.

He’s not lying when he says that this city isn’t safe—

—but at this point, I think I’ll take my chances.

“Uh, sure!” I agreed. “Sounds great!”

“It’s leagues better than staying at the Academy, that’s for sure,” Shuichi opined. “But, uh… how are we supposed to follow you? There’s no way we’ll be able to keep up with you and your friends.”

Sonic tore a plank of sheet metal of the ground, spinning it in his hand before placing it beneath his feet. “Yeah, that _is_ a bit of a problem.” He jabbed a thumb behind him. “Lucky for you that bus’s over there, right?”

I blinked. “Bus?”

I slowly turned to face where he was pointing, and lo and behold, there was a perfectly pristine bus just— _sitting_ out in the open, completely untouched by the wasteland around it.

Shuichi and I gaped at it in shock.

_… **whaaaaaaaa?** When did **that** get there???_

Everyone followed our gaze to the same vehicle, and reacted as could be expected.

_“Wowie zowie! It’s a bus! Look guys, isn’t that just great?”_

_“What the hell!? That—That’s not a trap or anything, right!?”_

_“That is… certainly too convenient to be innocent…”_

_“Atua has graced us with a gift! We should appreciate it!”_

“Yeah, that bus,” he confirmed. “It’s not as fast as me, but it’s definitely big ‘nuff for all of you!”

He hopped toward the edge of the nearby precipice, giving us a thumbs-up as he passed. “Just follow us down the road, and you should be good to go from there! Alright—Tails, Knuckles, let’s go!”

Sonic proceeded to jump off, a wondrous _“Yahoo!”_ escaping his lips.

Tails and Knuckles chased after him in short order, none too surprised by his rather reckless leap.

“Jeez, that Sonic… always such a show-off!”

“It is how he is! It’d be more surprising if he _didn’t_ do that…”

And so we were left in silence, our eyes still on the bus in front of us, and our thoughts completely scattered by what had just happened.

…

…

…

…

…

I rubbed the back of my head and sighed deeply.

“So…” I trailed off. “Which one of us here knows how to drive a bus?”

Crickets went up amidst a seas of awkward hums.

A sweat went down my forehead. “…oh boy…”

_Guess I’m gonna have to learn how to drive, and drive fast…!_

“Can I just say, for the record, that I think we’re all screwed?” Shuichi interjected.

“No, don’t worry, I’m… beginning to feel the same way,” I deadpanned.

Tsumugi raised a hand. “Can—Can we go back into the Academy now?”

 ** _“No,”_** we all replied.

She slouched dejectedly. “Okay, okay… we’re really doing this now, I guess…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> >>> **_NOW LOADING…_**
> 
> I’ve had this idea saved up for a while, now.
> 
> I’m only writing it now because I am bored and lazy.
> 
> I almost pity Kaede and co. right now.
> 
> Talk about jumping out of the frying pan and quite literally into the fire—sure, they escaped the Killing Game, but is _Sonic ’06_ really that much better…?
> 
>  ~~…eh, at least it’s better than having more than half their cast end up dead for one reason or another.~~ Ahem…
> 
> Well, that’s all for now! Tune in next time for—oh _**shit,** that tornado’s carrying a—_


	2. That Tornado’s Carrying a Monokuma!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sonic’s having a blast, Kaede is panicking, Shuichi isn’t much better, Tsumugi is completely lost, and thirteen other Ultimates would rather be somewhere else right now.

* * *

Somewhere around fifteen minutes later…

* * *

**[Kaede]**

[ **Crisis City – Tornado Zone** ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKNQEol9OXM)

_“Shitshitshitshit **shitshitshitshit!”**_

_I have literally **infinite** **regrets** right now!_

_“Left! LEFT!”_ Shuichi screeched, sitting in the seat behind me.

I twisted the steering wheel left as he recommended, narrowly avoiding a fallen over container and sending everyone in the back screaming their lungs off.

 _“Sorry, sorry!”_ I hastily apologized, beads of sweat going down my forehead.

Somehow, we’d made it halfway across the city in this bus, despite the terrain being about as drivable as Monokuma was charming.

If that was all we had to deal with, then that’d be one thing.

But then there were the weird _fire monsters_ and all the fallen over _stuff_ and I haven’t ever driven _anything_ before and _Jesus Christ there’s a freakin’ **tornado after us—**_

“Turn right, Kaede, _turn right!”_

A cry from Tsumugi sent me careening in that direction, a derelict and flying car crashing into the road where we just were.

_Oh, and cars! Lots and lots of cars!_

“Cars, barrels, big-ass rocks,” I grit my teeth—“is there anything here that _won’t_ get thrown in our faces at some point!?”

“We haven’t seen buildings get thrown at us yet!” Kokichi helpfully remarked— _Is it just me, or… does he actually sound a little winded?_ “There’s—There’s always that!”

 _“Nyeeeeeeeeeeh!_ I—I—I don’t like any of this!” Himiko was wailing. In the mirror, I could see her clenching her hat over her eyes. “Th-This is too much…! _I wanna go home!”_

“That’s what Atua is for, Himiko!” Angie chimed in. “Atua is a merciful god—if you pray to Him, He will surely guide you to salvation! This is just a small speedbump on the way there!”

Tenko took audible offense. _“Speedbump!?_ This isn’t a speedbump; it’s a _catastrophe!_ Packed in this cramped bus with all these degenerate males… I better not see any of you putting your gross fingers where they’re not supposed to be!”

“Fear not, then,” Korekiyo snarked—“even if I were that type of person, I’d rather not have to engage with your… unpleasant personality.”

“Unpleasant? _Unpleasant!?_ Get over here and I’ll show _you_ unpleasant, degenerate!”

I did my best to put everyone’s shouting out of focus as I maneuvered around this _incredibly_ broken boulevard – which is a little hard to do when your hearing’s so sensitive. Shuichi was helping me look out for stuff ahead, but that didn’t make this any easier!

“Just a little bit longer…” I chanted to myself, partially in desperation. “We gotta hold out just a little bit longer…! Eventually, this dang tornado’ll stop—it has to!”

Shuichi bit his lip. “I’m… glad to see you trying to be optimistic, Kaede,” he said, head leaning over my shoulder, “but—I can’t even see an end to this highway! Do you really think we can do this…?”

_~~That’s a good question…!~~ _

“I dunno,” I admitted, “but it’s too late to back out now! I promised that I’d get us all out of this mess alive, and I’m not gonna break it for anything!”

We’re already out from Monokuma’s grasp; anything we do here is all or nothing. Dying here is basically about the same as dying in the Academy, so—better we try for the best than wait for the worst!

“I… I guess I’ll have to trust you, then.” He lightly flinched as a bunch of wooden boxes crashed into the windshield. “I just hope that we won’t be too— ** _oh my god Kaede, look out!”_**

My attention snapped back to where we were going, just in time for me to realize Tails and Knuckles were approaching a little bit too fast for my liking—

Okay, scratch that, we were _definitely_ going too fast!

 _“EYAH!”_ I twisted the steering wheel as far as it could go, swinging past them with yelps from all sides included.

 _“Whoa! Are—Are you guys doing alright!?”_ Tails called from outside, barely fazed by our near collision— _how the heck can he brush something like that off so easily!?_

 _“Not really!”_ I screamed back, even more stress mounting in my soul. _“I just want this to be over already!”_

Shuichi slouched. “Oh, god… we are so, _so_ screwed…” he muttered.

* * *

**[Sonic]**

I briefly looked at the whirlwind behind me.

“Whoa, look at that!” I said—“That tornado’s carrying a car!”

Knuckles shot an annoyed glance at me.

“Yes, Sonic, we can see that! And all the other cars, too!”

As it turned out, whatever was powering the devastating going on around us also really, _really_ liked tornados for whatever reason.

So, here we are, running as far away from the thing as we could push ourselves.

And of course, the kids were putting the pedal to their medals as their bus swerved every which way—even almost clipped Tails and Knuckles in their panic.

_Yikes. Whenever this adventure ends, it might be a good idea to send ‘em through a driving course or something._

_Or a survival seminar, anyway—‘cause Chaos knows Eggman won’t stop trying to take over the world anytime soon._

I let myself skid over to Kaede and Shuichi’s window, hands enclosed into a classic V-sign.

“Yo! What’s up?”

 ** _“Everything’s up!”_** the two of them exclaimed.

…well, I can’t say that’s exactly a lie.

“Hey, look on the bright side!” I said, “This could be worse! It could be an orca breaking the docks you’re standing on, or a giant military truck pursuing you down San Francisco!”

They reacted incredulously to my anecdotes. “Orca!? Military truck!? Have—Have you _actually_ been chased by those types of things!?” Kaede asked.

“I’ve had enough of a panic attack just on this insanity…!” Shuichi heaved.

I nodded. “Yep! You’d be surprised about the type of stuff I’ve seen. In any case, I think we’re almost there—after all the highways high I’ve been on, I’ve got a pretty keen sense for this!”

A chorus of cries echoed from the inside of the bus.

**_“Really!?_ ** _Halle-fuckin’-lujah!”_

_“I must admit, that is… something of a relief!”_

_“Gonta is happy! Friends are saved!”_

_“Don’t start celebrating just yet, everyone…!”_

_Seriously, what a colorful crowd…_

“Oh thank god,” the self-proclaimed Pianist exhaled. “I’m not sure how much more of this I can take!”

“Is ‘almost there’ a few seconds from now, or a few minutes!?” Shuichi frantically queried.

I was about to answer, when I noticed the bus’s wheels ever so slowly leaving the ground.

My eyes widened. “Uh-oh! Looks like the tornado’s hungry for seconds…!”

Kaede and Shuichi blinked. “Huh?”

Now, I’m not exactly an expert on all things related to flight – you’d have to ask Tails, or even the Babylon Rogues for a lesson on that – but I was _pretty_ sure it’s hard to miss the feeling of being carted off into the air, inside a vehicle or otherwise.

Screams and shrieks soon replaced the earlier sense of excitement. I heard Kaede start banging at the control panel in clear panic, several frustrated cries coming from the girl’s mouth.

“No, no, no, no, _no, no, no, **no—!”**_

 ** _“Why the heck are we stuck with this bus!?”_** the tired-as-hell Detective wailed.

As it ascended higher and higher into the tornado’s reach, I dashed back toward my two best buddies and hollered—

“Tails! Knuckles! We’ve got a problem!”

Their heads whirled to face me, and then at the inexplicably airborne vehicle behind us. Their eyes similarly went wide,

“Oh,” Tails said—“yeah, that definitely looks like a problem!”

“Great, as if this day couldn’t get any worse!” Knuckles grumbled. “We gotta get that bus back on the ground, before it’s torn to pieces—and set on fire, too!”

_Easier said than done…!_

I snapped my fingers. There had to be some way to get us all out of this mess without ending up with a long list of casualties!

_Come on, Sonic, think— **think!**_

A lightbulb went off in my head.

“Hey, guys… do you think you can get me on top of that bus?”

Knuckles recognized the look on my face almost immediately. “Oh no,” he groaned—“we’re about to deal with another of your hairbrained ideas, aren’t we?”

“It’s either that, or we come back to find the charred corpses of our new friends,” I grimly stated.

I remember dreaming for two years about stumbling onto Shadow’s body after the Space Colony ARK incident. Even after he showed up alive during Metal Sonic’s attempted takeover, it still haunted me for some time afterward.

So here and now, when we’re so close to something similar happening here—

There’s no way I’m gonna let that nightmare ever become a reality!

Knuckles shook his head. “Put it that way, I guess anything’s a good idea here.”

“Getting you up there’ll take a lotta momentum,” Tails surmised, in tune with my own thoughts. “Knuckles and I won’t be enough by ourselves—but if we can use our **Team Blast** …”

I nodded. “Sounds good to me. C’mon, let’s step it up!”

And so it was settled.

One way or another, we’d bring this crazy show to an explosive close!

* * *

**[Tsumugi]**

_I have no idea what’s going on anymore!_

Everyone was either sprawled out on the floor of the bus or struggling to stay in their seats, no thanks to the tornado doing its best to eat us whole!

 _I just wanted to make this season of_ Danganronpa _the best the show’s ever seen!_

_Was that so hard to ask!?_

My head felt like it was spinning. About a dozen plot points and plot twists were tumbling through my brain, aimlessly trying to connect to—whatever kind of fever dream I was having.

“Ow…” I mumbled, rubbing my pounding forehead. “Oh, this is just plain ridiculous…!”

“Is everyone okay!?” Kaede’s voice called from the front. “That was—That was one heck of a liftoff…!”

“Thankfully, we’re not dead or anything,” Rantaro piped up. “And we didn’t fall out of any of the windows; these things are more durable than I expected.”

Ryoma sighed. “That doesn’t exactly mean a whole lot for us right now—the longer we stay in this tornado’s grasp, the likelier it is that we’ll all just be burned to death anyway.”

I shivered.

I had an execution plan for myself all ready to go, once the game finally made it to Chapter 6 and I was inevitably revealed as the mastermind of the whole thing. It’d be just like how Junko Enoshima was executed, 53 iterations ago—exactly how I’d prefer it to be…

…that is, if our little train hadn’t been thrown off the rails and into a mountainside, seconds away from a rockslide happening!

There’s not supposed to be Sonic the Hedgehog here!

There’s not supposed to be an actual real apocalypse here!

There’s not supposed to be a wholly fictional world here!

And most of all—

_We’re not supposed to be anywhere near **Sonic ’06**_ _, of all things!_

Now everything’s gone _wrong_ and we’re stuck in the orbit of a tornado on _fire_ and _I’m going to die from being torched, do you know how painful that is, I’ve seen that one execution in_ Danganronpa 42 _and it didn’t look pretty at **all—!**_

“Come on, Tsumugi, breathe…!” I told myself, arms wrapped around my body. “You’re still in control… You’ve still got this… Just—sit down and breathe. Breathe in… breathe in, and breath out… don’t panic…”

_That’s right! Just think about your favorite things!_

Danganronpa, _anime, your top-tier cosplays…_

_Focus on that, now…_

**_“I HATE EVERYTHINGGGGGGGGG—!”_** Monokuma screamed from outside the windows, being flung alongside us by the tornado.

“Hey, look at that!” Kokichi grinned. “That tornado’s carrying a Monokuma!”

…

…

…

_…agh, it’s not working!_

_“I don’t wanna die!”_ I cried. _“There are still so many things I wanna do first! I don’t wanna die, I don’t wanna die, I don’t wanna—”_

“Ah, shaddup, ya virgin Plain Jane!” Miu retorted, sounding more irritated than I’d ever heard her. “The world still needs _my_ genius, too, and you don’t see me complaining so much!”

“We won’t die here, not if I have anything to say about it!” Kaito declared, pumping his fists together and trying to act tough— _okay, maybe I wrote him to be a little **too** hotheaded. _“There’s gotta be something we can do—we just to have to put our minds to it!”

“Like what?” Maki snapped, significantly aggrieved. “In case you haven’t noticed, we’re clear in the sky in a baseline bus with no extra features! Unless you brought a jet booster and can attach it to this thing, we’re not gonna be going _anywhere!”_

“Chill out, Maki Roll!” he nonchalantly continued. “Giving up now won’t help at all. The impossible is possible! All we have to do is make it so!”

_“Wha—What did you just call me!?”_

“Hold up, everyone!” Shuichi’s voice cut through _~~(just like a Truth Blade)~~._ “In the distance… I think I can see Sonic coming toward us! Look!”

We all looked out the front of the bus, and lo and behold, there was a tiny blue dot steadily getting closer to our current position. Idly, I wondered what kind of glitch he was using – I may have been more of an anime connoisseur, but it was hard to miss how much of a disaster _Sonic ’06_ was.

_…wait, are real-life glitches **actually** a thing in this ‘verse?_

_~~How would I even go about asking about that…?~~ _

I shook my head.

Even if everything about this is wrong, wrong, wrong—

This is still my life, and I’m just gonna have to deal with it!

Getting back into character, I happily stated, “Oh, that’s a relief! How’s he gonna get us out of this? Is he going to make another tornado to stop this one, or—?”

Curiously, he landed on the front of the bus, and then bounced onto the roof. Confusion filled me for a brief moment, before we started to hear the sound of him charging up something.

The same exact sound we heard right before he (and Shadow) started blasting through all those fire monsters fifteen minutes ago.

“Huh…?” Kaede blinked. “What’s he doing?”

“Oh no,” I said. “Oh, _no.”_

 _“Buckle up, guys!”_ he said, once he was done revving up his… Light Speed Attack, I think it was called. _“This is gonna be rough!”_

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him hop behind the bus and place his foot on the door—

—and that’s the last thing I remember before everything turned into _chaos._

**_“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—!”_ **

**_“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—!”_ **

**_“WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE—!”_ **

* * *

**[Kaede]**

A loud crash rebounded into my ears.

I was sprawled out on my stomach, eyes dizzily trying to reorient themselves.

_“Awawawawawawawawa…”_

_I think I’ve had enough of this to last me a lifetime…_

_…but at the very least, we’re all still safe!_

_Which isn’t saying a lot, but it’s something!_

…

…

…you know, something about the ground I’m on feels a little softer than usual.

“Uh, K-Kaede…”

It might just be me, but I’m getting the sense that it’s… shaped like a person?

“K-Kaede, s-snap out of it…”

And Shuichi’s voice seems a _lot_ closer all of a sudden—almost like he’s right in front of me…

_“K-Kaede! P-P-Please get off me!”_

Then it hit me.

I was _on_ Shuichi. Chest first, eyes locking.

And actually, our faces were pressed up to the point of almost touching. 

I started blushing immediately, scrambling to get off of him as fast as possible.

“O-Oh my gosh! Sh-Shuichi, I’m—I’m sorry! I didn’t realize I was on top of you!”

“It’s—It’s alright,” he replied, though his furious blush and covered eyes made it clear what he was genuinely feeling. “A-At least you looked comfortable after falling… I don’t think everyone else can say the same.”

I took a glance at the rest of the bus; the rest of our group of Ultimates were strewn all over the floors and seats, as a result of Sonic sending us spinning through the air (though away from the tornado, thankfully).

_“Nyeh… This is such a massive pain…”_

_“Nyahahaha! Atua has saved us all!”_

_“I’m starting to miss being in prison…”_

_“Are those stars…? Have we reached space…?”_

_“Ah… This would be a beautiful moment… if I didn’t feel so bruised…”_

Also—somehow, the bus had landed on the ground straight up.

I’d call that lucky, if we hadn’t just been through a series of cataclysmically unlucky events.

Frankly, I think it was just life giving us a break for once…

I heard the wind billow by the double doors. Shuichi and I turned our heads to spot Sonic with his trademark grin on his muzzle, with Tails and Knuckles trailing behind him.

“Woo!” he cheered, arms raised to the heavens. “That was _tight!_ A little more intense than usual, but a rush all the same!” He smiled at us. “So, how are y’all feeling?”

“Could be better,” Rantaro supplied. “Didn’t help that we had one heck of a crash landing happen.”

“Give us a warning next time before you pull another stunt like that!” I scolded him, fighting the exhaustion seeping into my body. “I honestly thought that we were done for!”

“I never want to leave the ground again,” Shuichi groaned—“or see another tornado as long as I live.”

“Hey, we all made it, didn’t we?” Sonic shrugged. “And we got away from the tornado, too, so that’s a win in my book!”

“You get used to this with Sonic,” Tails told us, none too surprised by the hedgehog’s antics. “I can’t count how many times he’s jumped straight into some sort of death-defying spectacle.”

“Not to mention how many times he’s dragged _us_ into them,” Knuckles groused. “Seriously, those pinball machines gave me a real headache.”

“Aww, don’t tell me you didn’t like all the action, Knux!” Sonic teased. “I know you a part of you craves getting away from Angel Island every now and then!”

“Yeah, but at least on Angel Island, I don’t have to worry about getting eaten by crocodiles,” the echidna retorted.

_…do I want to know the context behind that?_

Tsumugi lurched forward over one of the seats, her glasses not quite aligned to her eyes. “Ugh… P-Please tell me it’ll be smooth sailing from here…”

The trio of anthropomorphic heroes caught each other’s eyes briefly. “That’s never a guarantee with Sonic,” Tails admitted, “but if it makes you feel any better, we’re probably through the worst of it now.”

Her hair drooped over her shoulders, and she sighed. “It… It doesn’t…”

_I feel you, Tsumugi… I really do._

Rantaro crossed his arms, and let out a small smile. “Consider it a once-in-a-lifetime adventure, then,” he said, patting the Cosplayer’s back. “You’re always talking about how plain your life is—maybe this is a chance for you to get to change that for yourself, become better friends with everyone!”

Tsumugi groaned louder.

I considered his words. “Put it that way, I guess this is something of an opportunity for all of us. We’ve survived this far; there’s no reason why we can’t grow closer as friends through all of this.”

“That’s the spirit!” Sonic beamed. “Now c’mon, let’s get everyone out. Knuckles says he senses some Chaos Energy in here—and it’ll be easier to investigate with nineteen heads instead of three!”

“Sure, sure,” Shuichi reluctantly agreed—“just… give us a bit. That heart-stopping nightmare took _a lot_ out of us.”

“What he said,” I added, rhythmically tapping my fingers on Shuichi’s shoulder. (He blushed again—he really looks cute like that, wow.) “Let us get my thoughts in order, and we’ll be right out

“If that’s what you need. Don’t take too long!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> >>> **_NOW LOADING…_**
> 
> This whole fic was going to just be a single chapter, but then I figured that it’d be easier on my procrastinating brain if I split it into two. So here we are.
> 
> From the start, I knew I wanted this fic to include the fourth act of Sonic’s Crisis City (‘[The Whirlwind](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyq8fzJDcRw)’, in _’06’s_ OST). It’s arguably the most memetic part of the whole level, so why shouldn’t I toss Kaede and co. into that trainwreck headfirst?
> 
> I also added a Tsumugi section, since she tends to be in the background for most of these fics (barring a bit of _It’s a Lovely Morning)._ She’s… very confused and on the verge of panicking. She may not be much of a video gamer, but I think even she knows where specifically she’s fallen into.
> 
> Oh well. She’ll just have to accept that she won’t be getting her perfectly-crafted Killing Game today. 
> 
> Sadly, I won’t be going further with this fic. I’d have trouble trying to keep the V3 cast relevant during _’06,_ and it’s not like their skillset matches the type of adventures _Sonic_ games typically involve. But hey, I’m sure they’ll find something to do in the meantime. They’ll have a whole new world to explore, after all…
> 
> Well, that’s all for now – see you around!


End file.
